August 4, 2004

One step back and one step forward

Filed under: The Journey — Tamra @ 5:08 am

Well, Rani was pretty sad all day. Not much crying, just laying on Dave’s shoulder. Not many smiles either though. Poor Dave is getting so tired. He just wants a little break, like to use the restroom :wink but she’s not having it! I feel so bad for him. It’s so hard watching from the sidelines and not being able to do anything. I am handling all of the bag carrying, car calling, man type stuff. We make such a funny couple right now. We’ve recieved our share of strange looks that’s for sure. :veryhappy

On a VERY happy note though :sing today we went to the embassy and filed the I-600 (orphan petition) and we also filed for Rani’s visa. We were expecting problems but really didn’t have any! I did forget the child study report, but thank goodness it didn’t matter because I have all of it memorized! Some papers we brought, like the homestudy addendum he didn’t even glance at. But I’m glad we had it there anyway just in case.

After that we had to take Rani to a local photographer for her visa photos. She actually sat on the bench next to Dave rather than on him for it! Turned out cute too! Luckily we had secured a driver who knows the process. He knew right where to take her. Next we went to see a Dr. for a child physical. I was about sick when they asked me for her immunization records. I didn’t think I had them but it was in the things the orphanage gave me! Whew! I also had to show them our intent to immunize form.

After the Dr. we headed home to lunch. We were a little nervous because we didn’t realize the visa fees were so high($335) and we didn’t know if we had that much left in traveller’s checks. Lucky for us the Lord is still looking out for us and we had a little bit more than enough. We headed back to the embassy after lunch and filed for Rani’s visa. After about an hour, and a little interview about how the adoption process has been for us, the man behind the counter smiled and said “Congratulations! We will be issuing your daughter’s visa. You can take her home.” I started crying. Many Indians were smiling at us. They seemed genuinely happy for us.

I have to say that I absolutely love the Indian people. They may not be rich, but they definately know what it takes to have happiness. They are so family centered and I have been so impressed at how much the staff of different places and just people we’ve met have been worried for Rani and have kept up asking how she is doing. It has been such an incredible experience. I’m finally comfortable in India and rather than feeling strange I feel right at home.

Dave has slipped up several times over the past week and even a couple of times today and said “Next time we do this……etc.” I’m just blown away! He knows that I really want a sister for Rani but at this point I’m the one who is hesitant. LOL He keeps saying he didn’t say that, or he meant when we visit India again for fun, not for adoption. But today in the embassy he said “Next time we do this you are going alone.” I kid you not! This man has fallen deeply in love with India. He is so impressed with the people, the way of life, the feelings and just general everything about India. It has been an amazing experience for him and I love watching it happen. I have to say though…next time we do this I will do many things differently that’s for sure!

As for the one step forward. Rani is really starting to communicate. The language thing has been so difficult because she really was/is fluent in Oriya. She has tried and tried to talk to us and must think we are idiots to not understand. Today though she looked at me and said “Wahneh”. At first I didn’t get it but then it dawned on me and I smiled and said “Water! Rani you said Water!” She smiled. I gave her water right away of course. Later she was saying “more wahneh” over and over and wouldn’t take water. I’m pretty sure she wanted more fruit snacks(which I didn’t have any more of) and didn’t know how to say it. It made her so frustrated. Of course I gave her a bunch when we got back to the hotel. Today she was also laying on the bed watching TV with Daddy. She started fussing and I said “What Rani” and she pointed in the direction of the bathroom. I smiled and grabbed her and ran, even though she was screaming and got her on the toilet just in time! YAY! She really hates pooping in her diaper and this has been one of our biggest hurdles. She holds it in until she’s in so much pain and then gets upset when it gets in her pants. So far though, pottying has been Mommy’s area much to Rani’s chagrin and she doesn’t seem to be fighting it. I’m so happy for her. She must be feeling so much better knowing that she can communicate her needs more effectively.

I must say, it’s got to be the mommy in me but I am understanding her body language and sounds so much better than Dave is. He just holds her and I watch her like a hawk and help him fulfull her every need. She has gotten to the point that she doesn’t cry for me to feed her anymore she just says “uh” becuase she knows I will do it. I carry around chappatis wherever we go so she always has a snack to munch on. So in reality even though Daddy is the consoler, Mommy is the communicater and server of needs. When she cries and I say “what do you need Rani” she usually will communicate it to me the best she can, where Dave is oblivious.

I feel like she is doing amazingly well. She is so smart. I cannot believe that brain inside that head. I think that is one of the things that makes it hard. She is not a baby at all and really is so much more grown up than that. She will not do something that she doesn’t want to where a baby would just not have a choice. She loves the computer and anything with buttons and her long skinny fingers love untying, unbuttoning, and unwrapping whatever she can get her hands on.

Her eyes do move a lot and she has a head shake. I have noticed there are times when they don’t seem to move at all. It is so funny to watch her try to focus on something small or to the side rather than straight ahead. Her head starts really wobbling. The poor photographer had a hard time with this.

And now here we sit in Delhi with two days left and nothing to do. I guess we’ll sleep in and relax tomorrow and maybe we’ll feel up to a little shopping or sight seeing, though we are getting low on cash. I wish we could change our plane tickets, but I don’t think that’s possible.

I got to talk to my boys today! Rani did too! She loved the phone and said “Hi brother Xander. Hi Grammie. etc” It was unbelievably cute! I was so relieved to hear that my baby is doing well under Grammie’s care (of course, this woman is amazing!) and that made me feel so great. My milk is back, I’ve been pumping like mad, though I can’t get miss Rani to take any. I’ve just been pumping/dumping but hopefully my baby will remember how to nurse when we get home. I miss it and sometimes I go to lay down and nurse Rani and have to tell myself I can’t do that! LOL

OK I’m rambling now. Thanks so much for reading our story! It’s so nice to know there are so many people rooting for us and of course praying for us. Rani is truly magnificent and I can’t believe I ever wanted to take her back!

One Response to “One step back and one step forward”

  1. traci Says:

    It’s a joy to read of your trip to get Rani. You are all in our prayers. May you have a blessed homecoming!! 🙂

    Blessings~
    traci

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